Sketch of a Volvo 740 taken from driveway

It took long enough, but it finally hit 70 in Seattle. In the morning driving in how the mist clung to the trees, and it was Double Stamp Wednesday at the coffee shop, and when I left work about noon it was starting to burn off, and I opened the sun roof and turned up the music and wondered if I had time for a nap.

How the dog’s ears flap when she walks and trots, all about. Spring. The breeze tickling the undersides of the leaves, the slow rain of cherry blossoms in the grass gathering like snow. I had my last meeting and took off my shirt and went outside with the foldout chair in the driveway, a can of beer and the radio with the garage bay doors open. Charlotte dug for worms, got hot and discouraged. The dog and the cat panting too, bent over, compromised, pathetic: hunkering down in the shade of the Volvo. Ginger’s face wrinkled and panting like a Mongolian dog painting, 14th century.

And despite the sense the world is about to peak with this exuberance still there is a suffering. At work, a pending announcement of org changes everyone knows is coming, but they’re hardened by it, unfazed. I think about a full time job there now and I can imagine it, I get excited by the thought. I talked to my career coach and somehow made it more real just by talking about it. I don’t like to believe I need status, I really don’t, but there’s an element of feeling legitimate you don’t get contracting. You can have the flexibility to leave at noon and walk your dog on the first nice day of spring (it took until May 3 to exceed the 60s here) but I felt like I wanted more.

Loren is coming with his son Arthur this weekend but the weather will turn by then, and we’ll be back to damp shades of green, morning soccer games, the challenge for me to cook vegetarian and find beer worth drinking that doesn’t have hops, for Loren’s sensitive aspect. “Sours,” a concept I don’t quite get, don’t have to.

Walking Ginger earlier, thinking all this and half-there experiencing it, half-not, thinking about it. Fully present with the sun in the foldout chair drinking beer though, barefoot, ignorant to what comes next.




Categories: Memoir, musings

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

26 replies

  1. just roll with it and see where you land )

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Read this on my newly improved porch. 60s, perfect night. The sun set brilliant orange to purple. The coyotes howl, wail, and screach, set of a chorus of country dogs. Glad you get the same. Ever need good dirt with worms, I got plent. Put 8 of a 100 tomatoes in the ground tonight, paid my boys a quarter each to carry cages. Good life, thanks for sharing yours!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ah, sipping beer in the sun with the dog scrabbling at your feet, your mind floating like a helium balloon just over your head … Sounds perfect. Hope the job possibilities work out for you and enjoy your weekend. Chilly, windy and grey here, naturally 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Lynn! Sorry slipped out of touch here and late to respond, bad week for being online. Better for the driveway I guess! Hope your weather takes a turn for the better.

      Liked by 1 person

      • No apology necessary at all. I’ve been so slow replying to people on the blog recently – taken on more work and preparing for the move coming up. So apologies back at you! Funnily enough, it’s been gorgeous here this afternoon, warm and sunny. Perfect for a wander down to our harbourside and ice cream by the water listening to the buskers. A little wedding anniversary treat – 24 years tomorrow, would you believe? Oh my lor 🙂


      • Oh my gosh Lynn! Happy belated anniversary…sounds so nice. Happy at last you’re seeing some of that warm weather, us too. Bill

        Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks Bill. Yes, astonishing we’ve been together ao long and still speak! Still sunny here during the day but chilly as the sun drops low, as if summer and winter have a time share on May 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      • On the seam as it were! From my Volvo driving in to work…sun + Cocteau twins

        Liked by 1 person

      • Yep, still walking that seam 🙂 Not a bad combo – Volvo, sun and Cocteau Twins! Have a good day

        Liked by 1 person

  4. The mood is palpable. Nice. I can’t imagine beer without hops, though. Without hops, it’s barley water.

    The sketch is magnifique! It reminds me of someone who had people draw bicycles from memory, then made real versions of their drawings! Have a look:

    In other words, I wish someone would build the car in the sketch.

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s cool! Glad you liked the sketch. That sketch book is 20 years old and the glue on the spine is all dried up yellow and exposed. Odd..


  5. Workplaces are organic beings, with diets that affect their moods. Sometimes you have to cut things out or add supplements to make things tick properly. I sound like you!


  6. Thanks for such awesome article please follow back to see my work


  7. Love that drawing; when I have my mojo for illustration (is it ever coming back) I draw like that. Erm, I’m not gonna call that “warped perspective”, sounds like an insult. Left side of the hood does exist in a plane different from the rest of the car. I like! Oi, you’re handsome by the way. Luv that nic.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Robert, yes it’s a warped perspective and that’s fair. Different planes for sure, “slanted and enchanted.” Thanks for visiting, reading and the kind comments! Glad you enjoyed my friend. Bill


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