This much madness is too much sorrow

Everyone wanted to know what Dawn was getting at the store and everyone had something to add to her list. I remember when Sunday nights turned into week nights because people would email and spin up work conversations about the coming week right there on a Sunday. And what a pity it was, we handed over the end of our weekends thinking about work, which isn’t much different than actually working. Just the sound of the dryer drum and a jazz trumpet for me. That’s a Sunday night, no buzzing sounds until Monday.

This is our house, it’s where we all live. We did get tired of each other at times, I know that. Toilet paper rolls got used up and the empty cardboard lay there unattended like no one lived here. No one dealt with much. I’d started picking at the skin around my cuticles again which is never a good sign. When I closed my eyes I saw the same pattern of weeds I’d torn out earlier. How I yanked them out with anger aimed at our president and all the injustices of the world: this is how you make change, by getting to the root. And I delighted in how many lawn bags I filled. Lined them up along the road. Thought maybe it’s time I did more with my life, hoped it wasn’t just another passing thought. The weeds grow back the next day. The weed as a metaphor for hate or intolerance works to a degree, but the hate or intolerance has their own version of weeds too. This is our house, it’s where we all live. And this much madness is too much sorrow.

Categories: musings, prose, writing

Tags: , , , , ,

17 replies

  1. Natural anger manifesting naturally. Change in mood noticeable.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Angry weeding, indeed. The news is now so upsetting I sometimes lie in bed tense and stressed at night, not sleeping. It’s like November, 2016 all over again, only the fears I feared then are actually coming true now. The good news is I’m studying systems theory, which is reassuring. It says that as systems break down, new ones take their place, usually better ones. And there are some signs of that now. That, and the fact that good and love are stronger than evil. They will win in the end. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. after getting to the end, it’s clear you’ve been through the challenges of co-existing in a space without the option of opting out, but have come to some sort of acceptance and peace with each other.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Also thumb limited, but appreciate the botanical rage and the share by WW. In a kind of perverse way it heartens me that people are sleepless with anxiety and restless in their dismay. From afar I view the mad emperor and think how can this be? Will the empire crumble or just the metaphors?
    Rest uneasy, friend.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Keep weeding out the bad stuff, a never-ending chore. Hoping to see all kinds of things weeded out and put on the curb this year. I didn’t know you were a Neil Young fan.
    And that dryer drum/jazz trumpet combo sounds interesting, snares & lint-trap-drum-kit.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Snares and lint trap drum kit sounds really good Robert. And yes to Neil, that phrase just sounded right on and apt. Be well, thanks for this and for reading…


  6. Staying on top of the weeds requires patience and perseverance. I think the country has shown time and again (especially with the pandemic) that we have neither. I think it’s awesome that racial justice is hash-tagging right now, but I hold zero hope for the future. We’ll be unable to agree on what steps to take, grow weary of it, and put it in the drawer until the next person of color is murdered in such a public fashion. Shower, rinse, repeat. We’ve been doing this with gun control since Columbine.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m afraid I see your point more than I’d like to admit, Jeff. About all I can say to that, thanks for reading and sharing your POV. Also for reminding us of that scene in Do The Right Thing, that’s stuck with me.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I hate to be a pessimist, but jesus, we’ve seen it how many times? On my way home from work today I heard on the radio a laundry list of some actions that NY has already taken. Heartening,

        Liked by 1 person

      • It’s alright Jeff, we’re all trying to make sense of something senseless, so there you go. Appreciate you sharing your thoughts here…thanks.


  7. That’s a great lyric and so appropriate to the times. How about this: Don’t let it get you down, it’s only castles burning…maybe things have to burn down to the ground before we can right them.

    Liked by 1 person

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