The intensely masculine act of grilling meat

It was very late February and we’d just gotten back from Disney. Charlotte and I went to the mall to make Lily’s birthday reservation at the Lush bath balls shop. It still seemed as if everything might be okay. We gave them our credit card and went on our way. A week later we had to cancel it though, everyone was freaking out. First week in March and talk of lockdowns and quarantine, people starting to wear masks.

I just felt detached from it all. A strange summertime with no parties, no hosting. Getting blasted in the backyard instead, staring at the sky, waiting for the first star. The smell of the night. The feeling that maybe I’m immortal followed by proof in the morning that I’m not.

It might have been a rock or a rabbit, the shape on the grass by the neighbor’s house with a bit of morning sun giving it a halo like some saccharine after-school special from the 70s. And then I saw it chewing, it had ears, and hopped a foot to the left, a rock with legs. Seems there’s rabbits everywhere now and I’ve never eaten one but I’m starting to think about it. Fresh rosemary, white wine, baby potatoes in a cast-iron pot come fall. Nick Drake.

The smell of a wet beach towel pressed against my face, taking in the scents of youth and memory, the forgotten core of me. And I watched the moon arc slowly across the sky as I grill-roasted the chicken and moved it halfway through, propped like a tripod on a beer can: beer can chicken, they call it. You stand a bird upright with an open can of beer up its bum and smoke it for an hour with the lid closed. Rub it with curry, cumin, all-spice, pepper and cinnamon.

I sat as the bird smoked and Beth trimmed our roses and the moon disappeared behind the house. And there was not much sound beyond the sound we made, smoke mixed with the setting sun giving the light texture, moving eerily like fog. We had nothing but time it seemed, but there would come a time we’d have no more. But that was far off, still. We had today.

Categories: humor, microblogging, writing

Tags: , , , , ,

14 replies

  1. We still have today. Need to remind ourselves of that.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Another beautiful post, Bill

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ah the panic of those early days, when everything changed. except beer can chicken, that is still beer can chicken.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. My son has a ‘varmint rifle’ which is a BB gun so powerful it can shoot through a one inch thick piece of wood. Every time I see a neighborhood bunny, I think of the future after the coming societal crash where I’ll go out and hunt rabbits and squirrel to keep my family alive.


  5. I am fascinated by what our culture deems masculine vs feminine.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I like the way you constructed that Nick Drake cameo. Like an afterthought, and yet, of course…

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a comment!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: